Driveway Spam

A good many months ago, out-of-the-blue, a Cary newspaper showed up in my yard. I thought, "hmm...the delivery guy must have gotten the wrong house, because I never asked for any Cary newspaper."

The next week, not-so-out-of-the-blue, a Cary newspaper showed up in my yard. I thought, "hmm...what in the world? Ah well", and tossed it in the recycle bin.

Again the following week, annoyingly, a Cary newspaper showed up in my yard. I thought, "hmm...this is starting to get on my nerves now."

Not to be overly repetitive, but yet again, the following week, a Cary newspaper showed up in my yard. Argh!

At this point, I am wondering why this newspaper keeps littering in my yard. Can I fine them $200 for littering? Will the State of NC fine them for littering? If so, can I have them fined for every single infraction? :) Do I have to put a "No Littering" sign up in my yard? Can I perform a citizens arrest of the distribution manager of the Cary newspaper? Can I litter in the Cary newspaper's lawn?

I think that's what I'd really like to do. I'd like to save up all these wasteful papers that they throw in my yard in their little plastic bags. After a while when I have a big gigantic pile of them, I'd like to drive over to the offices of the Cary News and throw them all over their property. In their driveway, in their lawn, and in their bushes. Then I'd like to see them say one freaking word about it. Ugh.

I know, I know - "just call them and tell them to cancel delivery, dummy!" Of course I will, but I should'nt *have* to.